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The Clinic: Troubles at Home

This week on The Clinic, Michael and Steph talk about their experiences with troubles at home and share some advice on how to cope with them while at uni. Along with some guest’s stories and advice that the listeners sent in, this show offers support to help you cope with various situations: sick family members, falling out with friends and family and grieving over lost ones.

Here are some ways we found that helped us cope with issues at home:

1. Talk┬áto people: Don’t feel ashamed or embarrassed to talk to the people around you and ask for advice. Talking about personal subjects might make you feel vulnerable, but it is good to have a close support system of people who can be there for you and give you an outsiders perspective.

2.┬áDon’t ┬áfeel guilty leaving people behind: When you move away from home, it is common to gain a new found independence and maturity. If you find you grow apart from your home friends, or realise that someone from home is treating you badly, it is perfectly okay to decide you no longer want them in your life.

3.┬áUse university as a distraction: When things aren’t going well at home, throwing yourself into uni life and friendships can work as a good distraction to make you feel better. Ring home regularly to check up on things, but ultimately while you are at university try to keep life as normal as you can.

4. Call┬áyour parents: If you are having issues at home, be that family or friend related, don’t be afraid to call your family and talk it out. Ultimately they should care for you and want the best for you, and therefore will offer what they can to support you.

5. Take it one day at a time: While you are anxious about people at home you might feel absent-minded or helpless. It takes up a lot of energy to worry about something upsetting you, so take things easy. If you find it hard to concentrate on lectures, give yourself the afternoon off to rest. Don’t feel guilty about taking longer to re-charge.

6. Feel all the feelings: Give yourself time to process things. There will be different stages that you go through, so just let yourself go through the waves. ┬áIf you need to be alone and cry, don’t hold it back. If you need to talk about it with someone, don’t be afraid to be vulnerable. Being upset is not a weakness, and talking about it takes courage. Your friends and family will respect that.

7. Don’t feel guilty: When something bad is happening to your family at home, it is easy to let yourself feel guilty for not being with them to help. Just know that doing your best at uni and regularly checking up on your family will be massively appreciated. Your family will be proud of you and will look forward to your phone calls.

8. Release your emotions through art: Art therapy is an incredibly useful thing when it comes to understanding powerful emotions, be that through music, painting, dance, baking etc. Doing something productive that you enjoy will channel all your strong feelings and help distract you, making you feel more at ease.

9. Take time out if needed: If you are finding work and lectures too much, don’t be afraid to ask for help. Email your personal tutor and tell them about your circumstances and they can ask lecturers to send you notes and recordings, or the can give you advice on how to get extenuating circumstances on your deadlines and exams. For further advice on this please go to the University website page here.

10. Time will heal your wounds: When something sad happens, especially regarding people we have known most our lives, it can be overwhelming because once happy memories become tinted with sadness (much like in the Disney film ‘Inside Out’). When this happens, just know that it won’t last forever, and all you can do is look after yourself and focus on the future. Eventually the sadness and anxiety will begin to fade away. If you are struggling with the loss of a loved one, the student intranet offers some great advice here.

Disclaimer: We are by no means professions, and are giving advice based on our own experiences and opinions on what we would do in these situations. If you feel affected by anything we talk about on our show, please seek extra help via the university’s services or counselling.

If you are struggling, please look into the support services that the university offers here.

“Ladies, We Need To Talk”

This week Gemma and Steph talked about struggling with the absence of a mother/daughter relationship at uni and how to cope with a situation where you would ordinarily turn to your mum. Whether that be going through a break up, finding your first boyfriend or starting your first day at a new job.

Your time at university is a period in your life filled with massive change. You’ll experience so many milestones and firsts at uni that it can seem terrifying, especially when you have to go through them away from home. No matter how old you are, there are some times when you just need your mum to give you a cuddle and let you know everything is going┬á to be okay. But what do you do when you’re on the opposite side of the country from your mum at a time like this?

The first point of call would be to turn to your friends, they may not understand you like your mum does but they will most definitely try to. Living with people at university gives you the opportunity to build close relationships with your housemates who can then go on to be your support network here at uni and so leaning on them at a time like this can be a great place to look for advice. Go and speak to your housemates/friends them whats up and i’m sure they will do there best to help you out (even if they just give you a cuddle).

However, there are times when you do just need your mum. Times like this are when you just have to call her, Skype her or even try and arrange a visit if you really need it. There is absolutely no shame in calling your mum and asking for help because she will know you better than anyone. Set out time in your day to call your mum and have a proper catch up and don’t hold back, you’ll feel much better afterwards.

Read Gemma’s blog here:
Ladies, We Need To Talk

Chill Tune of the Week:

Family of Aliens by Teleman

Check out the rest of the playlist.
Catch The Clinic every Friday 2-4pm on Xpress Radio.

The Clinic: Breakups on Campus

This week on The Clinic, Michael and Steph talked about dealing with breakups while at uni and all the challenges surrounding it like coping with heartbreak, telling your friends and family, managing work and all the services the university provides.

Here are some of our most effective ways of surviving through a break up:

1.  Talk to people: Most people will have experienced some form of heartbreak in their lifetime, so therefore will be able to sympathise and offer you some help and advice.

2.┬áDon’t feel embarrassed: It is common to feel shame or even guilt when telling friends or family about a breakup but DON’T. They want the best for you, and will be grateful that you have shared it with them so they can do what they can to help.

3.┬áDon’t worry about work: Often when a breakup is fresh, the last thing on your mind is work. If this is the case and your breakup is affecting your studies, you should email your tutor, who may suggest you apply for extenuating circumstances. Find out more about extenuating circumstances here.

4. Go at your own pace: Take things day by day by maybe writing a to-do-list to tick off throughout the day. Without your significant other, it will take a while to readjust to a new routine so take things slowly and eventually you will get back to your productive self.

5. Bad or good breakups, they are always hard: Even if someone has a good breakup, it is still difficult to get over someone, especially because you don’t necessarily want them out of your life. Allow yourself some space for a while, but don’t loose hope that you can’t get along again in the distant future.

6. What a time to be alone: Take this time to develop your sense of self; join a new society, start a new hobby, make some new friends. If you have been in a relationship for a while, it might be hard to imagine yourself without the other person. Now that you are by yourself, it’s a perfect opportunity to find out who you really are when you have no one else to worry about.

7. Self Care: Let yourself feel sad and don’t feel guilty if you don’t feel like being productive. Do things that cheer you up, like put on a soppy film, eat chocolate, go and see your friends, play video games or listen to music! If you guys have any other ways that you like to deal with breakups please let us know!

8. Don’t isolate yourself: As easy as it is to wallow in your sorrows and stay in bed, after you’ve taken some time to yourself go out and distract yourself by spending time with your friends. If you don’t feel like going out, try and get them to come join you and watch a film or have a board game night. Surround yourself with good people.

9. Focus on the future: Rather than thinking about the past, think about everything you have to look forward to- book a holiday with your friends, plan uplifting days out, organise a trip home to see your mum, go for a pizza with your housemates!

10. Numbing the pain is not an answer: Don’t turn to drugs or alcohol to distract yourself from your heartbreak. Repressing your feelings won’t help you move on healthily, so take your time, feel through the waves of sadness and go out and have fun when you feel happy to go out with your friends again!

Disclaimer: We are by no means professions, and are giving advice based on our own experiences and opinions on what we would do in these situations. If you feel affected by anything we talk about on our show, please seek extra help via the university’s services or counselling.

For more advice about breakups, look at the student intranet here.

“Ladies, We Need To Talk”

Gemma and Steph talked about what to do when youÔÇÖre in a relationship after your friend has just gone through a break up.

A friend getting broken up with is always a tough situation to navigate, never mind if you still have a relationship of your own to maintain. ItÔÇÖs difficult to find a balance between helping your friend through their break up and spending time with your s/o. However, there are some simple things you can do to help your friendÔÇÖs transition to single life as smooth as possible.

Firstly, do your best to not ignore your friend with they need you. If theyÔÇÖre struggling and need you around then reach out to your s/o and let them know youÔÇÖre going to spend the weekend with your friend. If theyÔÇÖre an understanding boyfriend/girlfriend then theyÔÇÖll see why you need to put your friend first for now. However, donÔÇÖt let your friend use you as their only support network or distraction from the break-up. If they lean on you all the time and donÔÇÖt spend time doing other things or on their own, then theyÔÇÖre probably not taking the time to process the break up properly, so make sure they take the time to do that.

ItÔÇÖs also important to make sure that when you do spend time with your friend you try not to ex-bash. ItÔÇÖs all too tempting to jump straight in to calling the ex foul things in an attempt to help your friend realise theyÔÇÖre better off without them. However, most of the time this doesnÔÇÖt work. If the break up is fresh your friend will more than likely still have a deep emotional tie to this person so hearing negative things about them will just upset them. Let your friend come to terms with whatÔÇÖs happened in their own time, theyÔÇÖll see the positives in the break up when theyÔÇÖre ready.

Read Gemma’s blog here:
Ladies, We Need To Talk

Chill Tune of the Week:

Autumn Love – Death Cab For Cutie

Check out the rest of the playlist.
Catch The Clinic every Friday 2-4pm on Xpress Radio.

Xpress’ new show on Radio Cardiff

What is ÔÇÿOpen HouseÔÇÖ?

Open House is a show Xpress radio produces for Radio Cardiff every with the hope of helping and building the RAS (Refugees and Asylum seekers) community within Cardiff. We work very closely with the charity ÔÇÿOasisÔÇÖ to gather pre-recorded content from members of the RAS community and use this as the base of the show when we present it live on Radio Cardiff.

 

When is ÔÇÿOpen HouseÔÇÖ?

Xpress present ÔÇÿOpen HouseÔÇÖ 13:30-15:00 every Monday live from the Radio Cardiff Studio and we gather the pre-recorded content throughout the week prior.

 

What do you do on ÔÇÿOpen HouseÔÇÖ?

The show consists of three main segments:

 

  1. Cardiff Through My Eyes ÔÇô This is the segment of the show where an RAS can reflect on their life in Cardiff and what it is like for them living within the Cardiff community. ItÔÇÖs a great segment of the show because it allows this person to talk about the positives of their life now rather than the difficulties they have faced in the past.
  2. ┬áCharts from Home ÔÇô This is a round-up of chart hits/popular music from an RASÔÇÖ country of origin. Here we have an interview from a member of the RAS community talking about their favourite music from home and we then play a couple of these tracks on the show.
  3. Interview of the week ÔÇô This section differs from week to week, depending on who the interview is with. It could be a personal story from an RAS, someone discussing RAS support and the services offered or an academic/politician/journalist discussing a topic that would be of interest to RAS communities.

 

Along with the three main segments we also discuss the support services and events that are on offer for the RAS community in Cardiff.

 

How can I get involved?

To get involved with the show join the Facebook group (Xpress Radio ÔÇô Open House on Radio Cardiff), here we post about the interview opportunities we have on offer for the upcoming show. We will be asking for people to go out to these RAS communities and charities to record interviews, stories or anything else you think would work well on the show. We then need two people to go and present live and play the pre-recorded content at Radio Cardiff on MondayÔÇÖs 13:30-15:00.

 

If youÔÇÖd rather work behind the sceneÔÇÖs we also have opportunities to help create with show branding, station sound and background research. There are plenty of ways to get involved and itÔÇÖs a really great opportunity to produce a professional journalistic programme on a community Radio Station.

Click here to see the Radio Cardiff website!