TikTok is flooded with this image of spotless kitchens, flowery aprons and picture perfect homes – neatly folding together retro glamour and domestic bliss. For audiences tired of hustle culture and girlbossing, the trad wife lifestyle holds a certain allure. It’s a throwback to an era we’ve been told was simpler and happier. Yet, like all nostalgia, there’s a catch: this rose-coloured view overlooks the messy reality of gender roles in the 1950s, when women were limited by experiences and fewer opportunities for independence. The ‘tradwife’ trend sweeps this reality under the rug, glossing over that era’s challenges as it sells the ideal of ‘traditional’ living.
Today’s tradwife icons aren’t just homemakers: they’re influencers. Through social media, they’ve rebranded the old-fashioned homemaker into something chic and aspirational. However, are these women selling a feminist dream or an unattainable lifestyle? Take Hannah Neelman, former Julliard enrolled Ballerina, she traded in pointe shoes for wellies and an egg apron. She shares her farmhouse lifestyle through carefully crafted posts showcasing home-baked pies, her swarm of eight children and cosy family moments. She’s built the ‘Ballerina Farm’ brand that brings followers a sense of nostalgia and simplicity. Behind the charming scene of lavish labour lies contradiction. For many women, adopting this lifestyle is unrealistic, not only due to the economic restraint of having eight children and facilitating a whole working farm, but also the sheer amount of physical and mental labour required to sustain it without the support of external help. Neelman, in the Megan Agnew interview for The Times, stated how she sometimes has to stay in bed for days due to exhaustion. The report, however agenda driven, extrapolates how this cute countryside aesthetic does in fact require a different form of labour as opposed to the constantly turning hamster wheel of corporate living.
These tradwife influencers insist that this lifestyle is all about choice, but for critics, it’s more complicated. Young audiences looking to influencers for role models might see this content and believe it to be a more desirable life, which risks locking themselves into more restrictive roles that feminists have fought long to dismantle. For many, this isn’t just a lifestyle choice; it’s an attempt to retrieve outdated gender expectations that tell women they should resort to being confined into the home again, in service to their husbands and families. Narrowing women into a restrictive view is worth asking: who is truly benefitting from this?
There is no denying that the tradwife trend is a current craze online, and it’s not hard to see why. Modern life can be exhausting, with the demands of careers, relationships and social expectations wearing people down. The transition from the pandemic could be to blame. With hustle culture being so prolific anyway, the pandemic has brought work to home and hasn’t quite made the transition back. The appeal of slowing down, embracing homemaking, and finding meaning in traditional roles can feel wholesome and soothing. And in an era where mental health struggles and burnout are on the rise, there’s little wonder why this image resonates so strongly. This lifestyle is ultimately curated, like any influencer content. Behind the shots of perfectly set tables and lovingly prepared meals, there are hours of work done by designated teams. The ‘peace’ these women are advertising is a product.
In the end, embracing choice means recognising the power in diversity – the freedom to live in ways that feel meaningful to each individual, unbound by historical expectations. As the allure of traditional femininity flickers in social media feeds, it’s important to remember that authenticity isn’t always picture perfect. True empowerment comes from celebrating women’s choices in all their forms, beyond curated kitchens and a perfect sourdough loaf, ensuring that tradition remains a choice, not a prescription.
Words by Emily Cartwright
Featured image courtesy of Katie Storrie. No changes have been made to the image.