Words by Megan Philip
We have all heard the phrase toxic masculinity often used to describe men displaying aggressive behaviours and in relation to sexual harassment. However, what is rarely discussed is the internal, negative effects it has on menÔÇÖs mental health and the ways in which it influences how men view their own masculinity.┬á
What is toxic masculinity? 
The dictionary defines toxic masculinity as ÔÇ£a set of┬áattitudes┬áand ways of┬ábehaving┬ástereotypically associated with or expected of menÔÇØ.┬á┬áThis reflects┬áthe stereotype┬áof what it is to be a man that is taught to young men. This narrow identity expects men to be┬áself-reliant and unemotional, rejecting anything that is deemed to be ÔÇÿfeminineÔÇÖ, whether that is expressing emotions, or asking for help as it is seen as being weak.
These unhelpful ideas are passed down generations through phrases like ÔÇ£boys donÔÇÖt cryÔÇØ and ÔÇ£man upÔÇØ as responses to boys showing emotions. The media is also at fault through its proliferation of hypermasculine representations in advertising, perpetuating these unrealistic and damaging stereotypes and ideals. Men being told time and time again they need to be stoic and that showing emotions is weak, leads to them bottling up feelings.┬á
A lack of emotional understanding and vocabulary results in boys growing into men who are unable to identify and process emotions and who might struggle to talk about how they feel. Consequentially, men are less likely to seek help for their mental health and tragically┬áÔÇ£75% of deaths by suicide are males”.┬á
As a society we need to create conversational space where men feel comfortable to share their feelings and encourage those struggling to seek help. The fact is that anyone can struggle with their mental health and there should be no shame in asking for help.
What is Movember doing for menÔÇÖs mental health?
One organisation finding ways to encourage these conversations and support menÔÇÖs mental health is Movember. The event is recognised for being the reason that so many men grow a moustache in November as a way of drawing attention to menÔÇÖs health.
Initially, Movember started in Australia in 2003 with 30 guys deciding to bring back the stache for the month of November as a way to fundraise for menÔÇÖs health and prostate cancer. The campaign came to the UK in 2007, and as of today Movember has helped to fund over 1,320 projects in over 21 countries. The organisation now focuses on raising money for the three biggest health issues affecting men: mental health, prostate cancer, and testicular cancer.
As previously discussed, toxic masculinity and the expectation of men needing to suppress emotions has resulted in many men not feeling able to have honest and open conversations. To tackle this, the┬áMovember Conversations┬ácampaign has been launched which is an online resource to equip people to check in with their friends more thoughtfully. It goes through imaginary conversations breaking down different stages of the ALEC acronym of: Ask, Listen, Encourage action, and Check in. There are hypothetical practice conversations with examples of helpful responses to different concerns. It provides ideas of what to say to a friend who is going through a breakup, struggling with work, or who seems withdrawn. ItÔÇÖs a practical tool to spot the signs of someone struggling, aiming to empower people to start difficult conversations.┬á
How can we all get involved in Movember?
Of course, growing a ÔÇ£MoÔÇØ is a great way of raising awareness for menÔÇÖs health but there are other ways to join the Mo-movement if growing a stache isnÔÇÖt possible:
- Move for mental health: The aim of this challenge is to run or walk (whateverÔÇÖs your pace) 60km in the month of November to remember the 60 men lost to suicide globally every hour.
- Host a ÔÇ£Mo-mentÔÇØ: This could be any social event where you encourage your guests to donate to the cause; perhaps a brunch, or quiz, or karaoke night.┬á
Even if you donÔÇÖt grow a ÔÇ£MoÔÇØ, make sure to check in with those around you and have the potentially difficult conversations. The start of winter can be an especially hard time for people who struggle so it is vital we raise money and awareness for menÔÇÖs health.┬á
If you are struggling with your mental health here are some useful resources: 
Student Connect: https://www.cardiff.ac.uk/study/student-life/student-support/student-connect
NHS: https://www.nhs.uk/nhs-services/mental-health-services/where-to-get-urgent-help-for-mental-health/
