During our first ever term at university, many of us scuttle in and out of the shared kitchen sheepishly: anxious about who we will run into. Living in halls with strangers, it becomes easy to get away with things. No longer under the watchful eye of our parents, bad habits have the freedom to breed excessively. 

Binge drinking, living on pot noodles, and staying up all night, are not uncommon. Neither indeed, are eating disorders. These may have long since developed; there may have been an effort in concealment for years. Whether eating a full plate of your motherÔÇÖs cooking, only to throw it up after. Or skipping lunch when you are at school, so you only have to eat two meals a day. Or perhaps saying things like ÔÇ£I donÔÇÖt have time to eat breakfast Dad, IÔÇÖll just take a snack bar,ÔÇØ only for the packet to stay unopened in a school bag all day. 

During the first year of university, hiding things will take less effort to begin with. It is a rare occasion for all, or even half of a group of flatmates, to be eating at the same time. Some people were brought up to think 5 p.m. is a normal dinner time, yet others are used to having their last meal at times when other people are already in bed. So, for a while nobody will have enough data regarding other peopleÔÇÖs eating habits, to make any kind of informed judgement. Secondly, whilst getting to know new people, it is hardly polite or constructive to comment on what or how much they eat. 

Later, in first year, or even perhaps not until the second year of university, things will get harder to disguise. Once close friendships have formed, quirks and disorders have a way of coming to light. Continuously small food portions will raise red flags. Someone who seems uncomfortable talking about food may cause concern. Throwaway comments about negative body image could spark uncomfortable questions. Individuals avoiding social situations involving eating will eventually become a noticeable pattern for those who get to know them best. 

It is a delicate line to cross, whether and how to go about interfering if you have a friend who is clearly struggling. Perhaps let them know in a safe, quiet space that you would like to help them; that you are there if they need to talk to somebody, and that you only want them to be happy and healthy. Tell them you understand it is not easy to break this cycle, but that you love them, and will support them through the journey. If they agree to let you help, know that oftentimes just having the accountability of somebody else gently checking in can be a huge step in recovery. Comments like ÔÇ£Would you like to have a bagel with me for lunch?ÔÇØ are better than ÔÇ£Just eat this bloody bagel!ÔÇØ 

As with so many other aspects of life, aggression isnÔÇÖt the answer: empathy is. The university provides counselling for those students who are struggling. Maybe the kindest thing you could do for someone is help them fill out a referral form or call their GP to book an appointment.┬á

If you yourself are struggling, be kind to yourself, ask someone you trust for help, consider professional support, and think about how you would approach the situation if your best friend were going through this.  

Words by Laura W. Schjoett 

If you or someone you know is struggling with an ED or any other mental health issue here some links to some services provided by the university and relevant charities: 

Cardiff Students Mental Health Page- https://www.cardiffstudents.com/…/health…/mental-health/  

Cardiff UniversityÔÇÖs Health and Well-being Page-https://www.cardiff.ac.uk/…/counselling-and-wellbeing 

Student Connect Team, based at the Centre for Student Life- https://intranet.cardiff.ac.uk/…/how-to-get-in-touch…┬á

Beat Eating Disorders Page- https://www.beateatingdisorders.org.uk/  

Mind’s Page on Eating Problems- https://www.mind.org.uk/information-support/types-of-mental-health-problems/eating-problems/useful-contacts/ ┬á