It can be difficult to acclimatise to old routines and lifestyles associated with our family homes, once we have moved out and started a new life at University. We asked our contributors to discuss their experiences manoeuvring between ‘home’ and Uni, and why they find themselves saying ‘get me back to uni’…
Words by Megan Philip
At University, many of us have found a new confidence, independence, and sense of self. For some of us, it’s the first time we’ve had to fully care for ourselves. Whether being self-sufficient came naturally or was more of a challenge, I have realised that there is nothing like going back home to highlight the ways in which you have grown up and outgrown your hometown.
In my first year, I would sometimes joke that it felt like I had jet lag when I came home from Uni, because although the trip was only two hours it felt like I was travelling back in time, travelling back to a past version of myself. I end up feeling like a child again, with predictable mealtimes and routines. I’ve also found that my mindset reverts to how it did during lockdown; – only thinking so far as to venture out for a walk. My life at home and at University look like complete opposites; from living in a city and getting to make my own choices, on where to live, and what to eat, to returning to a comparatively sleepy town. It makes me feel like my independence has been stripped. My life in Cardiff is almost completely detached from the life I come home to. It’s like I’ve accidentally created an alter ego.
Adjusting back into family life is always slightly tricky, I’ve realised that students collectively are rather flaky, self-centred, people. This makes it feel rather clunky when expected to assimilate back into being part of the family, having to relearn the art of compromise and rearranging plans. It’s strange feeling the need almost to ask permission to see friends when just recently you could’ve stayed in bed all day and no one would have noticed.
Over Easter break, I’ve been thinking about life after graduation and how it will probably mean moving out of my hometown. I have realised I only have a few holidays, so I have been fighting the desire to get back to Uni and have been trying to enjoy what makes this place feel like home,- reminiscing about my childhood and the familiarity of the place I grew up in. On my lockdown-like walks, I’ve gone past places with so many memories attached to them, old schools, friends’ previous homes, and the Nisa local I would go to every Friday as a kid. It sounds sombre but feels cathartic to see these places from a new perspective. It almost gives closure to a chapter of my life that I am grateful to have outgrown.
Although being at home feels more restrictive and distant from my Cardiff life, it also gives me space to reassess my priorities and gives me a chance to appreciate the accomplishments and friendships I’ve made, without the pressure of deadlines. However, every holiday before I return home, I just brace myself for the adjustment period, as I slip back into the patterns of my 16-year-old self.
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Words by Evie Lisk
For the months leading up to university, I dreaded the move. After years of covid and still feeling like a sixteen-year-old inside an eighteen-year-olds body, I felt like the last thing I was ready for was to live alone and essentially become an adult. I struggled to adapt in First Year and all I wanted was to come home, so I never thought that in Second Year I’d utter the words ‘get me back to uni’.
As much as I love the comfort of being home, surrounded by family, familiarity, and childhood friends, nothing can beat the lifestyle that is created at uni. Living with your best friends and feeling like you’re in a constant sleepover, going out when and wherever your heart desires with no questions asked and so much more. So how can one manoeuvre going home after months away?
Trying to fall back into the routine that was created for you at home can be difficult and often leaves me feeling more childlike than usual. Gratefully, my parents cook for me, pay for me, and look after me when I’m home, things that I automatically miss when going back to uni. But that often means I eat at their time and often have to inform them whether I’ll be home for tea in advance, which can be proven difficult when I’ve become accustomed to the spontaneous lifestyle of uni.┬á
For me, the hardest situation is trying not to disturb my family with my new ways of living. For example, waking up early to get work done or to exercise, staying up late Facetiming uni friends, or coming in from a night out – I’m sure it’s not just my mother who won’t sleep unless she knows I’m safely tucked up in bed. And if I even try to have one lie in I will be awoken by my brother blasting music, or pots and pans being banged downstairs. Therefore because of these things, I have become more partial to my parent’s schedule rather than the one I’ve created for myself at uni.┬á
As said before, as I view university as the place I grew into an adult, home has a childlike wonder about it. After becoming so content with the adult life that’s been built in uni it can be unusual to come home and immediately feel like a child, but for me, I’m unusually appreciative of that feeling.┬á I am aware that after university and moving out, I probably will not have that comfort any longer, and after a stressful few months at uni going back to that feeling does not hurt. However, as the end of the Easter holidays neared I felt myself craving that sense of independence again, the need to get back into my routine, see my best friends, and wander around Roath Park in the sun. So as much as a childlike few weeks can comfort me, two to three weeks is more than enough for me before I’m booking that ticket back to uni
