By Anushka Kar
Romance as a genre provides many individuals ÔÇô the majority of them being women ÔÇô as some sort of fantasy standard of their ideal partner, because, well, reality doesnÔÇÖt always provide this. Within romance comes many different tropes between two lovers, and the one I want to delve into for the sake of February and its all-encompassing ValentineÔÇÖs sentiment, is the friends to lovers trope. There are dozens if not hundreds of romantic tropes out there, so why are we not looking at ÔÇÿEnemies to LoversÔÇÖ, ÔÇÿForced ProximityÔÇÖ or ÔÇÿFake RelationshipsÔÇÖ?
While most romantic clich├®s provide some sort of excitement, thereÔÇÖs something unique about the ÔÇÿFriends to LoversÔÇÖ concept. I fully accept that my opinion consists of some bias, mainly because I myself, am a hopeless romantic and from a young age, dreamt of the coming-of-age type romance, but itÔÇÖs worth noting why many others resonate. ItÔÇÖs the innocent, heart-warming, heart-wrenching slow burner that we find in Cecelia AhernÔÇÖs Where The Rainbows End– that you might recognise now as its film adaptation, Love, Rosie– or Carley FortuneÔÇÖs Every Summer After. In both novels we see a girl and a boy with no expectations from the start, a childhood innocence, that blooms into an unspoken love as the two navigate adolescence. While their feelings seem unrequited, we always have the inkling the two are drawn to one another, through sparks or ÔÇÿmagic silences.ÔÇÖ Chapter after chapter, we see their confessions unfold- right up until their thirties, or in the case of Where The Rainbows End, their fifties. ItÔÇÖs never too late. The range of emotional scope and different perspectives we see of one person through anotherÔÇÖs narrative is huge; we see a friendship with all itÔÇÖs quirks, void of sexualisation and with an appreciation for the other. Gradually, romantic feelings are involved, and the characters are seen in a different light. Throughout these novels, above all romance, the pair are best friends; their compassion transcends time and almost anything is forgivable. In Every Summer After, when Percy and the boy next door, Sam, finally end up together, their communication between them suddenly ceases, which the author only reveals at the very end. The shocking events that unfold would make any couple feel queasy, yet the two bond for a second time over SamÔÇÖs motherÔÇÖs funeral; in an array of emotions and life-is-short sentiment, the two can never manage to hate one another. In Where The Rainbows End, a similar understanding is brought about; despite how many times the two friends are separated, and despite their unfortunate luck in their lives that further drives them apart, they manage to stay in contact and confess feelings for one another.
I suppose itÔÇÖs arguable the trope is a sickening clich├®, but itÔÇÖs one I never seem to tire of; itÔÇÖs intriguing to see the trauma both parties overcome, drawing them closer together. WhatÔÇÖs more, weÔÇÖre seeing the trope experimented with a little more; in Sally RooneyÔÇÖs Normal People, an awkward yet raw friendship is formed and unravelled between Connell and Marianne, who ultimately end up falling in love. ItÔÇÖs not love at first sight, or forced proximity, but rather an unexpected interest and respect in the social hierarchy of school life: the popular yet reserved boy and socially awkward yet forward nerdy girl fall in love as they navigate school, feelings and everything tumultuous that comes with them. Both the novel and tv show successfully depict a candid experience of young love and friendship, throughout their fallouts and into their adulthood. The interesting part these novels allow a glimpse into however is the dependence that naturally comes with finding your ÔÇÿpersonÔÇÖ so young. In Every Summer After, Percy who has a creative flair, stops writing all together after she breaks up with Sam while he continues to chase his dream of becoming a cardiologist; in Normal People, while Marianne thrives in college (albeit with her own issues), Connell goes into a depressive state during college when he is apart from Marianne. While she has some friends she can somewhat talk to, Connell cannot open up to anyone bar Marianne because she is the only one who has ever provided him with a sense of security, being seen and understood.
The ÔÇÿFriends to LoversÔÇÖ trope allows us to witness two characters develop as we follow their individual and intermingling stories; itÔÇÖs almost as if we grow up with them in some warped sense of time. In Where The Rainbows End we see this through an array of letters, emails and texts between Rosie and Alex; the language used at the beginning depicts discourse between two seven year olds, filled with spelling errors and blunt remarks. Throughout the novel, their communication is light-hearted, but gradually becomes more mature with insinuations and unsaid emotions; their friendship remains, but itÔÇÖs a case of right place right time for any romance between the two. ItÔÇÖs the same for Normal People, wherein every time Connell and Marianne become comfortable within their relationship, theyÔÇÖre uprooted to another chapter of their lives, and need to readjust. Every time it seems like ÔÇÿright place, right timeÔÇÖ for them, life seems to get in the way of their happily ever after; itÔÇÖs a back and forth, refreshing reality in the ÔÇÿFriends to LoversÔÇÖ clich├®.