Thomas Leeming looks at what being gay means to him
When you think of being LGBT+, you probably think of a range of differing stereotypes. You may well think gay men are camp, lesbians are butch and even that bisexual people are confused. These ideas are formed from a lack of understanding, further reinforced through the media. Transgender and transsexual people suffer from a similar misconception, that they are ÔÇ£probably just going through a phaseÔÇØ, while asexual people just havenÔÇÖt met the right person yet.
Although this can sometimes be the case (it is undeniable that some gay men can be very camp), it is wrong to assume that we are all the same. We are individuals, studying different degrees, with personal hopes and dreams for the future; we are not defined by our sexuality or gender.
[pullquote]Being gay is a very small, scientific, factual part of me.[/pullquote]
What is the same about us, though, is that, like straight and cisgendered (your gender matches your biological sex) people, we all have the ability to love, whatever our sexual orientation. We experience the same crushes, attractions and fantasies. We can be romantic, go on dates and buy flowers.
The other day, I went to the pub with some colleagues after work. There were some new people who had just recently started. IÔÇÖd only spoken to them briefly, and, therefore, they didnÔÇÖt know I was gay (although they may well have guessed!). The conversation turned to people we thought were nice, in more ways than one. I openly started talking about men and I didnÔÇÖt explain that I was gay; in fact, I donÔÇÖt think the word ÔÇ£gayÔÇØ was spoken at all.
ItÔÇÖs very normal for me to be gay. ItÔÇÖs natural and I donÔÇÖt feel strange or weird or different in any way. Of course, if everyone else IÔÇÖm with is straight, then I suppose I will be somewhat different, but I certainly donÔÇÖt feel unusual. IÔÇÖm used to be being gay. This is simply who I am. Being gay is a very small, scientific, factual part of me.
Things like gay pride, gay icons and having areas of cities dedicated to gay people can create the impression that weÔÇÖre somehow different from straight people, that we spend all our time living in a ÔÇÿgay bubbleÔÇÖ. Of course, gay pride and campaigning does wonders for fighting in the name of equality, but it does make us stand out a bit, sometimes unnecessarily so, because weÔÇÖre still human. Whether we fall under the category of L, G, B, T or + is only factual. We are are lot more than this, just living our normal lives.