Get on The Same Page: A How-To on Harmonious Communication

This article should give some simple tips and templates for communicating with your partner effectively about different issues. How do you bring up an issue without worrying or upsetting them? What is the best way to ask them to listen to you? One of the first lessons in communication that I remember took place upon the rug of my reception classroom, five years old cross … Continue reading Get on The Same Page: A How-To on Harmonious Communication

Contributing WriterMay 5, 2023May 5, 2023

…Are You Still Watching?

Porn seems to be a rather contentious issue depending on the relationship; some have no qualms whereas others consider it to be akin to cheating. I think the topic of porn and how it functions in relationships is a unique issue. PeopleÔÇÖs views are extremely polarising. For my current relationship, porn acts as a way for myself and my partner to satisfy our own needs. … Continue reading …Are You Still Watching?

Contributing WriterMay 1, 2023May 1, 2023

Are Student Union Nights the Heart of Cardiff StudentsÔÇÖ Dating Scene?

Cardiff UniversityÔÇÖs student union club nights can be deemed an incredibly favoured aspect of Cardiff University culture. Simply walk along Park Place or Senghennydd Road between approximately 8-11pm on a Wednesday, or Saturday night and youÔÇÖll get a feel for the sheer popularity of these events. Aided by an endless flow of VKs, students enjoy mingling with other likeminded people, but how successful are these … Continue reading Are Student Union Nights the Heart of Cardiff StudentsÔÇÖ Dating Scene?

Contributing WriterMarch 20, 2023March 20, 2023

The Validation Game

Words by Katie Brosnan External validation is an addictive drug. Whether you seek it from dating apps, social media or in person, it can either leave you feeling delighted or disgusted. As a result, seeking external validation can make you engage in a pattern of toxic cycles until you feel that bit better. Social media normalises these cycles too; weÔÇÖve all heard of Hot Girl … Continue reading The Validation Game

Contributing WriterMarch 10, 2023March 10, 2023

The Digitalisation of Modern Dating

Dating has long been referred to as a game, one with pieces and players and one that you need to learn how to play if you hope to find that oh-so-elusive stereotypical love story. Who makes the first move, when do you call, what can you share on the first date: all of these questions are based on long-standing inexplicable rules that the world of … Continue reading The Digitalisation of Modern Dating

dominicbcNovember 4, 2022November 4, 2022

The Ick: Is It Stopping People From Dating?

Words By Alice Moore The Ick – we all get it. Whether itÔÇÖs imagining them running for the bus, to getting food around their mouth while eating, itÔÇÖs becoming so much easier to get turned off by a partner for the smallest of things. This increasingly common gag has gained a high amount of traction on social media, but although it started as an internet … Continue reading The Ick: Is It Stopping People From Dating?

Contributing WriterSeptember 30, 2022September 30, 2022

The Pornstar Penis is a Fa├ºade

By Craig Strachan Porn can be a maze of so many unreliable truths and urban myths towards sex. The howling, the non-existent pubic hair, and of course the raw sexual energy of the plumbing and pizza delivery industries. Whilst many of these might become obvious to us later in life, a lot of us discover porn from an early age of adolescence where we wouldnÔÇÖt … Continue reading The Pornstar Penis is a Fa├ºade

Hope DochertyMay 2, 2022May 2, 2022

The Benefits of Outercourse

Outercourse is a word that most people havenÔÇÖt heard of ÔÇô itÔÇÖs a term used for sex without penetration. I remember asking my flatmates a couple of months ago: do you have sex without penetration? I was met with some judgement and a few harmless jokes, but thereÔÇÖs definitely a stigma surrounding the idea of penetration-less sex, which IÔÇÖve never really understood. I left with … Continue reading The Benefits of Outercourse

Contributing WriterApril 12, 2022April 12, 2022

‘Planning’ Plan B

By Phoebe Bowers TW: SEXUAL ASSAULT & VIOLENCE They donÔÇÖt call it ÔÇÿPlan AÔÇÖ for a reason. For type A personalities, ÔÇÿPlan BÔÇÖ may seem like a frivolous option to rely on – I have even known people who have had no idea where to go or what they should say to require this pill that a lot of us feel so begrudgingly about. There … Continue reading ‘Planning’ Plan B

Contributing WriterApril 7, 2022April 12, 2022

The Big ‘O’ IsnÔÇÖt Always the Goal!

By Alice Moore For years, sex has been entirely based upon reaching the ÔÇÿBig ÔÇÿOÔÇÖ ÔÇô the orgasm. Sex was conceptualised as a competition with one goal only, and failing to make yourself or your partner reach this was essentially deemed as a failure; a waste of a shag. It goes without saying that this perception was (and still is!) highly patriarchal, predominantly focusing on … Continue reading The Big ‘O’ IsnÔÇÖt Always the Goal!

Contributing WriterMarch 8, 2022April 7, 2022

Don’t Lie, You Met on Tinder

There is a strange shame in admitting you met your partner on Tinder. When I think about it there are only two real reasons (at least that I can think of) as to why this is the case: 1) You have to admit you were actively searching for someone romantically. 2) thereÔÇÖs a sense that you ÔÇÿfailedÔÇÖ the romantic game. What I mean by this, … Continue reading Don’t Lie, You Met on Tinder

Contributing WriterFebruary 13, 2022February 13, 2022

Friends…with Benefits

Can it work? I think we will begin at: are we still friends? Which is no. Not even acquaintances. We never talk anymore either, though IÔÇÖm sure many of you had already guessed that. I would love to say I hadn’t been warned of what I was getting myself into, but all my friends were disgusted with the contract (with added benefits) I had entered … Continue reading Friends…with Benefits

Contributing WriterFebruary 1, 2022February 13, 2022

Instagram shadowbanning sex education

Shadowbanning: Instagram’s Sexual Content Policy Endangers Sex Education

By Sasha Nugara Shadowbanning, also known as stealth banning and ghost banning, has been around since the 1980ÔÇÖs and is used to block comments and posts by certain users. Recently on Instagram, many accounts that use the platform for sex work and education have found their accounts have been shadow banned, limiting their reach and customer base. Despite the fact that this shadow banned content … Continue reading Shadowbanning: Instagram’s Sexual Content Policy Endangers Sex Education

Sasha NugaraApril 30, 2021April 30, 2021

A wlw couple are set against a background of wavey lines in pink, purple, and blue

I Am Not Your Porn Tag – The Weight of Bisexual Fetishisation

By Rahima Bhatti ÔÇ£ArenÔÇÖt you a bit young for that girls?ÔÇØ A middle-aged man smirks at me at age 15, standing outside school, holding hands with my girlfriend. It makes my skin feel like itÔÇÖs going to turn inside out, but I just smile in hope that heÔÇÖll leave us alone. These experiences stick with you, they ingrain themselves in your consciousness, making every man … Continue reading I Am Not Your Porn Tag – The Weight of Bisexual Fetishisation

Contributing WriterApril 9, 2021April 30, 2021

labels in relationships

‘So what are we?’: Exploring Labels and Self-Advocacy in Relationships

words by: Sarah Mason New people are exciting, new sex is exciting, and new relationships are perhaps the most exciting. Not only do you get to discover another person, but through your experiences, you also learn about yourself, your desires, your needs, and your boundaries. In the midst of these blooming connections, youÔÇÖll eventually reach the infamous point of ÔÇÿthe talkÔÇÖ. Maybe scary, but oh … Continue reading ‘So what are we?’: Exploring Labels and Self-Advocacy in Relationships

Contributing WriterMarch 10, 2021March 17, 2021

guide being sexually sensible

Love, Sexual Health Awareness Week 2020

Big Sister: A Guide to being Sexually Sensible

This guide to being sexually sensible kick-starts a series of articles created for sexual health week. By Olivia Adams The conversation surrounding sex can be a difficult one. In many regards, it is considered a taboo subject. Many have and still frown upon the discussion, perhaps because of the private nature of the experience or because society used to view it differently, which can make … Continue reading Big Sister: A Guide to being Sexually Sensible

Contributing WriterSeptember 15, 2020September 14, 2021

New Year New Me: Leaving Toxic Relationships Behind

By Kate Waldock As the first academic term of the new year creeps ever closer, students returning from previous years and those that are newcomers have a chance at a fresh start. We start a new year; many of us still reeling from relationships left behind in the past. University is exciting, it brings with it the opportunity to meet new people and potentially find … Continue reading New Year New Me: Leaving Toxic Relationships Behind

Kate WaldockSeptember 5, 2020September 8, 2020

art Cynthia Vera racial fetishisation

I Am Not Your Porn Tag – The Weight of Racial Fetishisation

Words By Cynthia Vera Art by Jasmine Snow ÔÇ£Hey, chocolate mama!ÔÇØ See, these were the first three words a grown man ever yelled out at me which I remember making me feel like my body was not my mine, but rather an unwilling participant in a parade of sick fantasies. See, I was only 14, chubby cheeks and strong bones. I was still growing, still … Continue reading I Am Not Your Porn Tag – The Weight of Racial Fetishisation

Contributing WriterAugust 19, 2020April 30, 2021

LGBT+ LGBTQ+ lockdown

“I am essentially trapped” – How LGBT+ Students Are Holding on During Lockdown

Words by Kate WaldockArtwork by Kate Waldock Away from family and without the worry of parents and siblings prejudice, University is for many LGBT+ students a haven of peace to be comfortable with themselves. Lockdown presents a new challenge and many have had to stumble back into the proverbial closet at home, hiding their identities for a long period of time. Being pushed back into … Continue reading “I am essentially trapped” – How LGBT+ Students Are Holding on During Lockdown

Kate WaldockAugust 12, 2020August 14, 2020

thepaperphantasm sex relationships university

Let’s Write About Sex and Relationships

Words by Laura Dazon & Art by @thepaperphantasm on Instagram Welcome to Spotlight: Sex and Relationships! With this post, we celebrate the start of a new project. This year, Quench finally has a space dedicated to sex and relationships! Up until now, the Cardiff student media has lacked a reliable safe space to talk about one of the most important parts of student life. Spotlight … Continue reading Let’s Write About Sex and Relationships

Laura DazonAugust 5, 2020August 5, 2020